"Just heard on the news that the state of Florida could be sunned-in for the next several days.
Residents have been urged to hunker down at your nearest beach and/or tiki bar for further instructions.
Use extreme caution when braving this blizzard of sunshine, preferably SPF30.
We are asking our friends and relatives to the north to please keep us in their thoughts as we deal with two feet buried in the sand."
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